TOP 10 Things I’d Like To See In Theaters for 2009
- Filed under: Humor
- Date: May 12,2008
2008 is a decent year for movies but they still haven’t met my criteria for “Best Movie Year Ever”, so here are a few things I’d like to see in 2009.
10. Jackie Chan speaking understandable english
I would like to understand the words coming out of your mouth.
9. Eddie Murphy using profanity
Who wouldn’t want to hear Donkey tell Shrek he is acting like a little bitch?
8. Scott Baio: THE MOVIE
The automatic reaction to this picture is to slap yourself in the head and ask, “Why didn’t I think of that?”
7. All Midget Casts (Little People for you PC types)
As long as it’s not a romantic drama but especially if it’s a World War II movie.
6. Mike Myers not sucking
Cat in the Hat ruined his street cred, possibly forever
5. Will Ferrell not sucking
His internet videos are more popular than his latest movies.
4. Adam Sandler not sucking
A Mossad agent fakes his death so he can re-emerge in New York City as a hair stylist. It’s like he used a Madlib to come up with this idea.
3. Video game movies not directed by Uwe Boll
Here’s hoping for a Peter Jacksons’ Halo.
2. Actual celebrity nudity (no body doubles, damn you Jessica Alba)
I’m pretty sure there is something magical underneath those clothes.
1. Any movie that has monkeys riding things (i.e. motorcycles, midgets, dogs)
If a picture is worth a thousand words, think how much a whole movie is worth!
16 Responses for "TOP 10 Things I’d Like To See In Theaters for 2009"
This shit is hilarious bro
I love Will Ferrell but the movies he has been in recently did not meet my expectations at all! They were not nearly as funny as I thought they would be!
when jessica alba used a body double???
I don’t know what planet you guys live on but Semi-Pro was hilarious.
You might disagree with me here, but whilst Will Ferrell does have some degree of talent, Adam Sandler is a bloody great charisma vacuum.
Whiplash the cowboy monkey is, put simply, funny as fuck.
I agree with most of this, but give jackie chan a break, I’d like to see you try to speak understandable mandarin.
some Nazi dinosaurs, any movie with Nazi Dinosaurs is worth it i think
I luv Jessica Alba she’s like barbeque sauce, she just makes everything better. She was so sweet in Sin City.
oh, comon, Jackie Chan is not difficult to understand
What if ya tossed in all of ‘em? Could the tiny scope of human consiousness handle it all?! Could our brains really take jessica alba nekkid? i can see the headlines now; Heart attack epidemic-smokin’ actress to blame.
Yeah I totally agree with #3. Just don’t make any video game based movies. And as for #2 celebrets going nude in the movies souds good. As long as it not an out of shape actor like Travolta or Rosie O’Donnell. But if its a pretty female I’m all for it.
For #7 watch “The Creeps”:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0129852/
Jessica Alba gets butt naked in Fantastic Four. I guess you missed that one. Noob.
Even Dwarfs Started Small by Werner Herzog has an all-dwarf cast.
5. Will Ferrell not sucking
4. Adam Sandler not sucking
My only problem with this list is that Zohan was friggin hilarious
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